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| Popular Saints Parede |
What we really mean is “I don’t care.”
2. I will make you a sheet. (Faço-te a folha.)
This one goes along with another saying: “I will turn you into an eight” (faço-te num oito).
3. There is no bread for crazy people over here. (Não há cá pão pra malucos.)
Whatever nonsense you’re asking for, you’re not going to get it here.
4. Let yourself off shits. (Deixa-te de merdas.)
Stop the bullshit
5. You are giving me a thong. (Tás-me a dar tanga.)
This one isn’t about underwear and it doesn’t matter if you’re a man or a woman. We just know you’re messing around, so we’re basically asking ‘are you trying to lie to me?’
6. I'll take care of your health. (Eu trato-te da saúde)
No, it's not a doctor talking with you is a warning that when possible your ass will be kicked
7. May the lightning break you. (Raios te partam)
You got us so angry that we actually want to have a little chat with Zeus himself. What should you do now? Well, according to popular Portuguese wisdom, go find your mother-in-law because no lightning can break her. (Não há raio que a parta!)
8. Go for a walk around the big pool table. (Vai dar uma volta ao bilhar grande.)
The pool table might be just an imaginary place in our mind, but for the sake of the argument, why don’t you walk until you find it?
9. You are here, you are eating. (Tás aqui, tás a comer)
Of course you know you are “here,” and I can assure you this is not an invitation for a meal. It means things are heating up and might get violently physical.
10. Lower the little ball. (Baixa a bolinha)
You’d better calm down, or ‘‘tás aqui, ‘tás a comer’ will apply.
11. I will put your clothes closer to your fur. (Chego-te a roupa ao pêlo)
Strange? Well, we are mammals who walk around wearing clothes. So I guess if another clothed mammal starts a fight, our clothes will be closer to our fur/skin than they have ever been before.
12. Unshit yourself. (Desenmerda-te)
It’s probably about time you figured it out for yourself.
13. Put yourself with a stick. (Põe-te a pau)
Don’t put a stick anywhere, but instead see this as a warning to be more careful with what you say and what you do in the future.
14. You are getting wood to burn yourself. (Estás a arranjar lenha para te queimares)
You’re the one causing all your trouble.
15. Put yourself into the eye of the street. (Põe-te no olho da rua)
Just as with a hurricane, the eye is the centre, and the access to the street is just through the door you came from. So if you stay there or not, it’s your problem.
16. This is going to give sauce. (Isto vai dar molho)
This is going to cause problems.
17. I am passing myself. (Já me estou a passar)
Your Portuguese friend is not going anywhere, but she’s definitely trying to tell you “I am feeling really pissed off” right now.
18. Now the female pig twists her tail. (Agora é que a porca torce o rabo)
Do you know when a pig twists her tail? Well you can either watch a nature program on pigs or trust me when I say “now things are getting really hard.”
19. Do you want me to make you a drawing? (Queres que te faça um desenho?)
Apparently you are struggling to understand what is going on, so do you want me to draw you a diagram?
20. You will be slapped, and you will not even know what town you are from. (Levas um estalo, que nem sabes de que terra és)
Yeah, ’cause that’s how strong we are.
21. Do you want to take it in the trunk? (Queres levar na tromba?)
First things first, the trunk is your face. It may be considered a physical threat, but for now we’re just asking if that’s where you want to take it.
22. Are you trying to be a racing mackerel? (Estás armado em carapau de corrida?)
A racing mackerel is the mackerel that thinks he can swim faster than all the other mackerel. Are you really trying to outsmart all the other fish?
23. What does the ass has to do with the trousers? (O que é que o cú tem a ver com as calças?)
“How is that even related?”
24. Put yourself in the prostitutes. (Põe-te nas putas)
This isn’t a suggestion for free or paid sex, it’s more like a suggestion for you to leave before you get into troubles.
25. Don’t stretch yourself. (Não te estiques)
Don’t push it.
26. I am shitting myself for that! (Estou-me a cagar para isso!)
I’m not really shitting myself, there’s just no other way to say “I couldn’t care less.”
27. We've got a female donKey in the cabbages . (Temos a burra nas couves)
It is a problem if the donkey is eating our cabbages, so it's mean that something is wrong.
28. Vai à fava. (Go to the broad bean)
Back in the when day people used black and white broad beans to vote, “mandar à fava” meant “stop arguing and vote on it.” But somehow, although the votes have now been cancelled, it is still used regularly to stop arguments and tell others to bugger off.